Goals and Not Settling

"Don't settle for anything less!" That seems to be the theme of the last week of my life, but that deems the question: Don't settle for anything less than WHAT? Most of that talk has come when it comes to men in my life. I have many people who are telling me not to settle for anything less than the best and what I want when it comes to a man; to keep waiting for the most amazing guy out there. And, I won't! However, when I look at how far I've come in the last couple of months as a person and as an athlete, I can't help but to look at goals I've set. This is totally appropriate because in June, I set some goals and I was going to evaluate them on Labor Day. Well, it's Labor Day and I'm going to do JUST that. Here are the goals I came up with at the beginning of June:

• Do unassisted pull ups in a WOD
• Double Unders in a WOD
• Get down to my goal weight
• 30 days of clean paleo
• WOD 5 times a week
• Not to walk during a running WOD
• Do almost all WODs RXed (4/5 a week)
• Get a sub 7:30 mile
• Finish a 5K in under 27:00

I have achieved MAJORITY of those goals! I haven't achieved one and the other two I just haven't timed myself for. I have not gotten down to my goal weight (2lbs away!), but more about that later and I simply haven't timed myself on my mile run or 5k time... I will be doing that SOON! But, I first would like to celebrate my success! That's a CRAP ton of stuff that I accomplished over the course of 3 MONTHS! I am not the greatest at DUs by any means, but every time they are in a WOD, I go for it and have been able to string together 42! Eating clean paleo for 30 has been the easiest for me... I was pretty dialed in on my nutrition before, so, it wasn't difficult. The only time I really cheated this WHOLE summer was when I went to Florida... I've WODed 5 times a week since June when I started going to Team Saturdays. I stopped walking in WODs in Florida when my brother and I created WODs together and I was trying to keep up with him :-) I've only scaled a handful of times since June as far as reps are concerned, however, I've adjusted to weight a little bit, so, I've scaled as far as that's concerned. The most difficult goal to complete has been with my pull-ups. It's been an awful battle, but I feel like I've started getting into a grove with them. See, I RX the WOD, but if it's a high rep of pull ups, I scale ONLY my pull ups until I get used to them... See proof below :-)

I'm the one to the right in the grey shirt and the black pants. I LOVE that this pic was taken because by looking at the picture, I can tell that I need to poke my head through a little more to open up my shoulders. Again, it goes back to the fact that I have to get used to the rhythm. I'm gonna keep working on these FOR SURE! Soon, I will be able to do them when I RX WODs completely :-)

Now when it comes to my "goal weight", I'm actually not very upset that I'm not there for many reasons! If there's one thing I've realized this summer, it's that numbers, especially on the scaled do NOT matter! Before I went to Florida, I bought size 6 jeans and was STOKED about that! However, recently this past weekend, I randomly tried on size 4 jeans and they FIT! And then I tried on some size 4 dress pants and they fit! I am MORE excited about the fact that I'm freaking in a size 4 than I am sad that I didn't make my goal weight. Do I think that I will get there? Absolutely! Remember? I'm not settling, but, I'm not killing myself to do it! Obviously what I'm doing is working and I even plan on dialing in on my nutrition even MORE as I will be participating in CrossFit Fire's Better Body Challenge starting next week! I can't wait! I will also be posting "progress pictures" within the next week :-)

Now I should start to set some new goals. I'm not sure what they will be quite yet... I'm gonna take the next week to look through my WOD book and will hopefully have my goals decided on within the next week, so, watch out for those! 

A few other fun things that have recently happened that I would like to mention:

1) Our affiliate softball team won their tournament! We played so well and had SO much fun! You could not see a happier group of grown ups than on that night:

2) This past Saturday I participated in the 31 Heros WOD, along with CrossFit boxes around the country. It was a doosey, but I loved every second of it!

So, as far as goal and life goes, I'm done settling! As I keep achieving more as an athlete and as a person, my goals will continue to be raised... These last 7 months since starting CrossFit has been an amazing journey and I can't wait to see what the next 7 bring :-) Ok, I'm out... Laundry folding WOD... 3, 2, 1, GO!

Back to Reality

I've been out of "Blog-World" for a couple of weeks. The first week that I was absent was because I was on a family vacation in Cocoa Beach Florida. Before we left for vacation, I was BEYOND excited to go! I couldn't wait! By the time we were done with vacation, I was ready to be home. Funny how that happens, huh? I had such a great time relaxing and creating memories with my family, but if anything, being on vacation, made me realize how grateful I am for my life. I had so much that I was looking forward to getting back to: I missed my church, my friends, my own bed, my car, CrossFit Fire, my dog, my job, etc. It's not that I don't like being out of my comfort zone, the contrary is true: I live my LIFE out of my comfort zone. I was just ready to come home to my life... I realized how incredibly blessed that I am.

My training on vacation was AWESOME! I worked out everyday! A couple of times, my brother and I put together WODs, which was awesome because he knows how to push me! A couple of times, I worked out on my own. A couple of times, I just ran on the beach. My body was WRECKED after the week, but I knew that was totally fine because I would have two rest days for travel. So, I figured, why not work out everyday? It was great getting up early, working out, sipping coffee by the ocean, etc. I loved it! The picture is from one morning when I got up so early to do some double under work, that the sun was rising, AND I got to see dolphins. I also took one morning and went to work out at CrossFit Cocoa Beach. It was interesting to see how a different box was ran and to talk to the owner... Plus, it was an awesome WOD!

My diet on vacation was actually, surprisingly good! I had a few cheats: M&Ms, ice cream one night, and a few night with adult drinks ;-) However, I am very pleased with how well I did. I am grateful that my brother and his wife were there to help me stay on track. I didn't gain a single pound over vacation, which was HUGE for me since I was nervous to get back on the scale. I am not only 4 pounds away from my goal weight! I'm buckling down on the diet these next couple of weeks because I had a goal to be down to my goal weight by Labor Day weekend. We shall see :-)

After driving all the way through from FL back home to IL, the next morning, it was back to reality: I had to go grocery shopping and to the teacher store. All of last week, I was back in my classroom getting set up and preparing it for 24 new young minds to develop. I also took a day to go shopping with my best friend since I had absolutely NO work clothes that fit because they were all too big... Let me just say, trying on clothes is WAY more fun when you are actually happy with how you look in clothes! I'm not totally happy with my body (after seeing pictures of me in a swimsuit, I know I have a lot of work to do... LOL), but the progress is unreal AND I do love how clothes look on me :-)

As far as training is concerned, it was SO GREAT getting back to CrossFit Fire! As I was walking up to the door to my first class back, I felt "at home". I think it's just something about the incredible community there that I missed. These incredible people have become such an intricate part of my life that I really truly missed them while I was gone. I loved being back! The training this week was awesome and totally wrecked my body, as usual. We did one round of "Fight Gone Bad", and I was pretty disappointed in my performance. I was hoping to break 100, but only got 93. Then, I started comparing my results to others, which just made it worse. A ton of my insecure thoughts came racing back to me: you're not good enough, you're not cut out for this, you're not pretty enough, no wonder you're still single, you have more weight to lose, you'll never cut it as a CF athlete, etc. It was awful! Luckily, I had people to turn to in order to pray for me right away. Sooooooo... In a nutshell, I need to stop comparing myself to others and start looking to only please Him alone. I STILL can't get my pull-ups, which in itself frustrates me. I KNOW I am strong enough! At this point, I just don't know what my deal is... I don't know if it's a mental thing, with my kip, or if I seriously can't do them. Is that possible? For someone to just not be able to do pull ups? I refuse to believe that's true, but either way, it's frustrating that I STILL can't get them! I feel like I'm putting forth all this work towards my pull ups and I've got NOTHING to show for it... I don't know... I feel VERY discouraged after this week. Let's hope this week is better!

Well, other than feeling discouraged with my performance, I am SUPER excited for tomorrow because it's the start of my second year teaching! I seriously love my job and could not be more excited to get back to it! I had an absolutely wonderful and relaxing summer, but I'm ready to the unpredictability that comes with my routine life :-) So, that's all for tonight... Not much of a blog post; really just me venting. So, sorry to disappoint you followers... I just had to get out my thoughts! Haha! Gotta get to bed early tonight because my body is NOT used to this schedule! Good night all!

Acceptance/CFGames 2011/Shrinking

As I'm getting ready to leave for my family vacation, I realized it's been a while since I've blogged and as usual, I've got a LOT to say! This shouldn't surprise anyone :-)

ACCEPTANCE
For those of you who don't know, I've been struggling with my pull ups these last couple of weeks. It's been frustrating because I KNOW I'm strong enough to do this... Heck, I can jerk 67kg. However, something about the kipping in the pull ups is really throwing me off lately. So, I decided to accept the fact that my pull ups just aren't WOD ready. Although I can string 5 together, that doesn't mean they are ready for a WOD. I've been going back to the band to work on my kip and working dead hangs to continue building my upper body strength. Once I get back from vacation, I plan on doing mini-WODs after my workout that include pull ups in them to work on stringing together multiple movements. I've accepted the fact that right now, my pull ups aren't ready, but I refuse to allow that to define me as an athlete! I do not plan on accepting this for long. I'm giving myself another month to re-evaluate where my pull ups are at.

As I've moved beyond frustration and into acceptance, I couldn't help but to reflect on how this carries on in my life outside of CrossFit. There are many areas in my life that I need to learn to accept where I am now. That doesn't mean I don't do anything about it, but I have to learn contentment. So, my challenge for you: what are areas of your life that you need to accept with where you're at right now? What do you need to do to move forward?

CFGAMES 2011
For those of you living outside of the CrossFit world this weekend, it might comes as news to you that the Games took place this weekend to find the fittest team, man, and woman on the Earth. It was thrilling to be able to watch the live feed all weekend long. I was hooked! I started reading up about how far CrossFit has come and I am simple astonished. It truly is amazing! I have no doubt that CrossFit is the future of sports and is here to stay! It is going to continue to grow. Why? There are MANY reasons as to why, but I am convinced it has to do with the character of the athletes and community. One of the best parts is seeing the first competitor finish stay and cheer on the last competitor. Only in CrossFit will you get the audience cheering louder for the last person to finish than the first person. Only in CrossFit can you see two "rivals" hug after a competition. I might be new to the sport of CrossFit, but this is what makes it stand out amongst every other sport; it is super apparent to me that CrossFit is here to stay and I am super grateful to be a part of it!

On a personal level, I am even more determined to work on my weaknesses. One day, I hope to get to the games as a competitor. Sounds crazy and probably not a realistic goal, but you've gotta work towards something, right? So, I am! Everyday after class, I am trying to work on a couple of weaknesses in order to make me a stronger person, CrossFitter, and competitor. I know I have a LONG way to go (heck... I couldn't even make it through running today without walking during our WOD), but I absolutely LOVE CrossFit and will do what I need to do as an athlete. Next year, I can almost guarantee I won't be competing, but you bet your butt that I am planning on going out to Cali next summer to watch the athletes I look up to. I am inspired beyond measure and am so glad I got to watch! I could go on and on and on and on about how jaw dropping it was to watch, but words won't do it justice :-)

SHRINKING
I have been eating paleo and CrossFitting since February. I lost the first 20 relatively easy. Then, I hit a month plateau, adjusted my diet and lost another 12. Since June, I have only lost 5 pounds. I knew that the weight would become increasingly difficult to come off as I got more lean muscle, but I couldn't help but to be discouraged. Then, I thought about the big picture: in 5 months, I've lost 37 pounds! That's CRAZY! Not only have I been losing weight, but my strength is increasing! I know when many people loose weight, their PRs go down... Guess I'm an exception! Although it may have taken me 2 months to loose 5 pounds, I'm more than happy with that because I went down ANOTHER pant size! What's crazier than losing that much weight is that I went from a size 14 to a size 6! It's official... I'm a size 6 and darn happy with that! Not only do size 6 pants fit, but there's room to spare! I don't think I've been a size 6 since I was in Junior High. I'm 5 pounds away from my "goal weight" and you know what... It could take me two more months to loose that, and I am MORE than fine with that! Now, I just gotta figure out how to reorganize my finances to by pretty much a whole new work wardrobe... I could have way worse things to complain about :-)

Alrighty, I have more to say, but I will stop there! Gotta shower and start packing to get ready for vacation! With that said, I have to add that I am a pretty organized person, but I can't help but LOVE the chaos before a BIG trip: laundry needing to be done, last minute errands, boxes with food, packing, check lists, etc. I am lucky enough to have had parents who took us epic road trips growing up... I can't wait to get to do that with my family some day! Ok, I am going to leave now and enter to chaos of getting ready to leave on a road trip with the WHOLE family. The worst part could be the ride down there... Wish me luck!

Kickin' insecurities in the FACE!

A couple of months ago, I was debating going to CrossFit Fire's "Team Saturday" WOD. However, I was severely held back by insecurities: I didn't want to be the person who held down a team and then no one would ever want me on their team. Basically, I was afraid of failure. Confessing these insecurities to a friend, he said something that has stuck with me every time I find myself getting insecure... He told me, "I say you kick insecurities in the face!" Naturally, at that time, it made me giggle/smile real big, but I made excuses and said, "Oh, maybe in another month or so..." I said I'd do it when I was consistently WODing 4 times a week or when I lost 10 more pounds or when I can do pull ups unassisted... Blah, blah, blah. You name it, I used the excuse! 

About a month ago, my brother, who I also CrossFit with, asked me to join him for Team Saturday. I tried to come up with excuses, but then he confessed something to me that made me decide to go and endure it with him. He had never gone to a Team Saturday before and was nervous himself. I knew it was either now or never. If there was anyone who could get me to go with him, it would be my brother. So, I made a deal with him: I told him that I would go IF he made me bacon, eggs, and coffee afterwards. So, we had a deal, and I got my booty up out of bed that next morning.

I'd love to sit here and tell you that I LOVED the workout, but the reality is that I HATED every second of it! I had never wanted to quit that badly in a WOD before, but I didn't. I got through. And wouldn't you know it, I signed up for the torture again the next week. NOT only did I sign up for the torture, but I also signed up for Oly class, where I PRd on my Split Jerk and made it onto the "Record Board" at our gym. I was hooked and have gone every Saturday since (minus one because of my hurt ankle) and plan to continue going as long as nothing interferes with it.

I have to say, I'm SO glad that I finally got up the nerve to "kick insecurity in the face!" Yesterday was an EPIC birthday WOD for one of our coaches and I seriously LOVED every second of this WOD. It was... 

In teams of 3:

2 rounds of:
4:00 AMRAP
5 tire flips
10 push-ups
4:00 AMRAP
10 sandbag shoulder to shoulder push presses
40 yard sandbag sprint
4:00 AMRAP
10 ball slams
10 pull-ups

*only completed rounds count

The rain added to this splendor of this super fun WOD! Oh! And, did I mention that my team won?!?! Insecurity of Team Saturday is officially CRUSHED!Here's my team from Saturday... Not the most photogenic picture, but I was wet and sweaty and just got done with a kick-butt workout!

I have been very intentional this last week of putting in some extra work at CrossFit doing some running, rowing, pull ups, ab work, etc. I've probably been staying half an hour to 45 minutes AFTER my class and it's felt GREAT! I've been super challenged and my body is so beat up, but I love it! Can't wait to do the same thing this week! BOOM!

I am still scared/afraid of failing. Ok, so, I know that this is not an uncommon fear, but I truly am, which is why I am SO hard on myself. However, I've decided that it's time to keep kickin' this on in the face. How? You ask... Well, today I registered for the MetroDash and the LifeAsRx competition. Neither one of those do I think that I will do very well at. Heck, climbing an 8ft wall scares the crap out of me... What if I can't get my booty over it? What if I'm the last one to finish? A CrossFit competition? What if I don't have my pull ups by then? What if I DNF (Do Not Finish)? The thoughts and insecurities and questions are plaguing me right now. But, even if all those fears and insecurities come true, it doesn't matter! I need to prove to myself, not anyone else, that I can conquer my fears. Even if I come in last, it will be a GREAT experience and a really great benchmark for me as a CrossFit athlete. I'm nervous, scared, anxious, insecure, fearful, etc. But, I know I need to do this. I need to kick insecurity in the face :-)

Bring on the Rain!

Ever since last week, my game has been off. I feel like after making some tough choices last Sunday, I have been on sort of n a downward spiral. Kind of like one of those weeks where everything that could go wrong, does... Things just are not going well. Then, the one thing that I felt like was improving, CrossFit, just got crapped on (for lack of better words) as well since I feel like I'm taking like 20 steps back in some areas. It's not the end of the world, and although things don't seem to be improving for me (especially today!), I love that I have my faith to keep me grounded. In times like these in my life, when I feel like life is totally out of control, that's because it IS! Times like these are a good check for me because it helps me remember that I am not in control of my life. That's why, every  morning, I pray for God's will. It helps, when days like today happen to know that there is a bigger picture. There's a bigger picture than what is going on in my life today, especially when I know so many people with so much more going on in their lives than in mine! At CrossFit, there is a bigger picture than the last week and a half; I need to look at the last 5 months. My life is not condensed to this small amount of time that I have on Earth. My new goal, more important goal, is to have an eternal focus in my life. The things of this world are given to me from God; the good and the bad. I have to trust that when life seems most out of control, that it's because He's the most in control. As I was receiving one bad news after another today, this song popped into my head and and it's so empowering... It's by Jo Dee Messina and is called "Bring on The Rain" (click to hear the song):

Another day has almost come and gone
Can't imagine what else could go wrong
Sometimes I'd like to hide away somewhere and lock the door
A single battle lost but not the war ('cause)

[Chorus:]
Tomorrow's another day
And I'm thirsty anyway
So bring on the rain

It's almost like the hard times circle 'round
A couple drops and they all start coming down
Yeah, I might feel defeated,
And I might hang my head
I might be barely breathing - but I'm not dead, no ('cause)

[Chorus]

I'm not gonna let it get me down
I'm not gonna cry
And I'm not gonna lose any sleep tonight ('cause)

Tomorrow's another day
And I am not afraid
So bring on the rain 

[Chorus]

Bring on the rain; bring on the rain

Bring on the rain 

Bring on, bring on, the rain 



*So... Ya know what life? Bring on the rain because if anyone can hack it, this girl can because of how big her God is! Good luck trying to bring me down because it's not happening without a fight! Can't wait to take out this frustration at CrossFit tomorrow! I can't wait to channel this and focus on other people other than myself :-)

Sometimes, you just have to kick something...

So, I'm going to be totally transparent here: I had a REALLY crap-tastic week, which lead to a carb-tastic diet. My week started out on Sunday with some really tough personal choices that I had to make. I am lucky enough to have such great people in my life to help me walk through those tough situations and help me make the "right" choice for my walk with God and for my life. Although it was a super emotional choice, I know at the end of it, I made the right choice. Monday, I had my first mental block when it comes to pull ups (read previous blog for more details). Tuesday was pretty good... I actually think that's when I PRd with my Front Squat 78kg, which just so happen to make the record board :-) I can feel my strength increasing like no tomorrow and I love it. Unfortunately, my endurance is not catching up as much. Anyway, Wednesday totally threw a loop for my training as I got a REALLY strange stomach bug. I threw up like 3 times in the morning and the rest of the day, although I was able to keep food down, I felt weak and queesey. Thursday morning I felt better and decided to hit The Fort, which I'm SO glad I did because it was another WOD where I got to practice my Double Unders in an AMRAP and I am very pleased with how I did, since I just got semi-cozy with my DUs a couple weeks ago. 

Anyway, to the main event: Friday! I knew I would HATE the WOD because my brother warned me about it... And I did pretty much hate every second of it. My awesome coach, challenged me  in the last round to try unassisted pull-ups again. I got the first few, but after some more thrusters, my mind drew a blank again. It's like I got up to the bar, knew I was struggling with this, and couldn't do it. I was trying and trying and trying and I could NOT get my chin over the bar. I finally got ticked off enough that I kicked the box I was using prior to help me get in the band. Yup! You heard me right: I KICKED IT! AND I'D DO IT AGAIN! Sometimes, you just have to kick things to feel better and let out your anger! I lost for my cool, ripped my hand, and got so ticked off that I just kicked it. I finished the WOD fuming and frustrated with myself and I just stood on the box (yes, the same one I kicked), cried, and tried to listen while my coach and others were encouraging me. Once my usual, rational side of me came back, I felt foolish, apologized, and said appropriate thank yous. I feel like I am strong enough to do pull ups, but for some reason, mentally, it's not coming.  Grrrrrrr... Anyway, actions have consequences. This was mine:

Yup... Sprained my ankle! Although, Friday night, it didn't feel like that! I got home from dinner with my teacher mentor, and it started aching a little bit. So, I iced it. Well, as the night went on, the pain got worse. So much to the point that I was laying in my bed, crying/screaming in pain, and thinking it was broken. After some research, I decided just to treat it like a sprain and see what happened in the morning. When I woke up in the morning, the throbbing was gone, and I was able put weight on it and walk on it. I spent the day treating it, minus making up a sit up and hand stand push up WOD since that doesn't require ankle use AND since I had to miss Oly Class and Team Saturday. I was lucky enough to be able to attend two friend's wedding last night. The pain was bearable and my ankle stood up nicely while dancing mostly on one leg. However, the outfit that I had to sport, was not my first choice. I knew heels would be out of the question and instead of rockin' some fabulous heels, I rocked an ACE bandage and flip flops... I know, I'm REAL classy! LOL!

My diet this week was absolute crap. Not going to lie! I am an emotional sweets eater as it is, combine that with a difficult week, plus I got my "monthly" friend this week (sorry if that's TMI, but I warned you it was SUPER transparent) = LOTS of carbs! I made paleo-friedly-cookies and ate LOTS of 70% dark chocolate and LOTS of fruit! As a result, I'm up 3 pounds (the 3 I lost two weeks ago). I'm hoping that with honing in on my diet this week, that they will come back off. It doesn't help that my mom bought me my FAVORITE treat: 64% cocoa dark chocolate covered almonds. I LOVE her dearly and I love that she knows me so well, but I also have very MINIMAL self-control when it comes to chocolate.

I know my love of all things carbs is one of the reasons why my weight loss is very much on a plateau and I'm sure doesn't help with my performance at CrossFit. Once these Almonds are gone (which it won't be long), I'm going cold turkey without chocolate. Just something I need to do for a while. Maybe until work starts back up again in August... Haven't fully decided, but I need to view treats, even Paleo-friendly-treats, as a TREAT, NOT an everyday part of my diet!

Anyway, despite my craptastic week, there were a FEW bright spots that I don't want to go unnoticed: 

• Front Squat PR
• Power Snatch PR
• Double Unders used again in a WOD
• Extra Credit Rowing
• Midnight showing of Harry Potter
• A stranger telling me that my legs are "jacked"
• The wedding.

With that being said, I would like to say "Congratulations" to John and Kirsten! There is NO DOUBT that God ordained your relationship from the beginning! I feel so blessed to be such a part of your lives and to have shared such a wonderful day with you! I love you both and am praying for your new life together as a married couple! God's love shines through your love for one another :-)

Mental Block!

I have only been CrossFitting for about 5 months now and as I was looking through my WOD book last week, the progress that I have made is CRAZY! I went from scaling from B or C, slowly to A, and now RXing almost every WOD (with a little bit of scaling like bands or boxes for HSPU), makes me feel very proud of my progress. However, as proud as I am of my progress, the longer I CrossFit, the longer my list of things I need to work on becomes. Here are just a few of them:

• Pull ups
• Double Unders
• Burpees
• Rowing
• Running
• Toes to Bar
• Hand Stand Push ups (HSPU)

One character flaw of mine is that I am SUPER hard on myself. If I don't get something, I get really frustrated, which causes a mental block. I have hit a few mental blocks since starting CF and have been able to push through pretty easily. However, I have hit a block that I have not been able to get over. Since my CF box did Fran and I felt like a cheater, I vowed that I would work on pull ups everyday. I also decided to hone in on Double Unders as well. My Double Unders have come a long way and I can't wait to get to use them in a WOD again! And last week, I thought I had FINALLY at long last gotten my pull ups! I was so excited to be able to string 5 together that I vowed to myself that the NEXT pull up WOD, I would go unassisted. 

My CrossFit thoughts were heard and I thought today would have been the PERFECT day to do it! It was a 12 min. AMRAP (As Many Rounds As Possible) of 7 HSPU and 12 pull-ups. An AMRAP?!?! Should be the perfect time to try my pull ups. I knew it would be tricky because it was super hot and muggy and that there would probably be a LOT of slippage on the bar, but I told myself, "Even if I have to get one pull up at a time, I'm doing this without a band!" Well, that was IF I could get one pull up... I couldn't even get one! So, I quickly grabbed a band, and could only string together like 2 at a time! What the heck was the deal here? My coach was telling me that I wasn't using my shoulders like I should in my kip, but for some reason, my body wasn't letting me. It was like there was a disconnect between what my mind KNEW to do from practice and what was actually happening with my body. It was the strangest and most frustrating experience that I have had since Fran a month ago.

I know a part of it is my fault because once I get frustrated with myself, it's difficult for me to shake it off and get back at it. I think I was just so frustrated that I have been practicing so much and didn't feel like I had anything to show for it. And not to anyone else, but to myself. I needed to prove to myself that I could do it and I failed. I actually had to fight back tears during the WOD. So, today, I am reminding myself WHY I fight through and WHY I CrossFit. I CrossFit because (amongst many other reasons)...

• It's a challenge
• There are great people to do it with
• It takes me out of my comfort zone
• It pushes me to the limit
• It's a freaking AMAZING workout
• It has gotten me in better shape than I was in high school when I played 3 sports
• IT'S FUN!

I CrossFit because it's fun! I need to take myself at CrossFit less seriously! Generally in life, I don't take myself seriously (I laugh a LOT at silly things I do), but for some reason, at times, like today, at CrossFit, I take myself too seriously. I just need to relax and not get so down on myself. Should I still practice and try different things? Yes! Absolutely! I got some solid advice from a fellow CrossFitter who told me to practice different movements along with pull ups. So, tomorrow, I'm going to get right back at it, except take that advice; Maybe I will try 5 push ups and 5 pull ups. Or, since I need to work on rowing, maybe I will row 500 meters and do 5 pull ups. I think doing two movements together is what is freaking me out. I need to get over this mental block and remember that I CrossFit because it's fun!

I'm so grateful for the people at CrossFit Fire, who won't allow this mental block to get the best of me and for constantly supporting me and offering solid advice. I will get through this and I will WOD with unassisted pull ups very shortly! Just wait and see :-)